What Else Was There to Do?
by Jack E. Peace
Summary: Set during "The Model Home", Marissa is more then confused on how she feels about Ryan and Luke and being around Ryan isn't really helping.


Disclaimer: None of the characters belong to me; the title comes from the song "I've Fallen in Love With You" by Joss Stone.

A/N: So, this story takes place during "The Model Home." I'm sure that someone else has already done a story like this but the idea just came to me when I was listening to the Joss Stone CD (which is very good, by the way.) Just for reference, this scene is set before Marissa goes to the house and Ryan tells her that they're from two different worlds. So review and let me know what you think.

Marissa Cooper wondered if falling in love with Ryan Atwood meant falling out of love with Luke Ward. And then she wondered if that was such a bad thing; Luke had been her boyfriend since the eighth grade and she was never quite sure why they had been dating for long. Luke had more faults then he had strong points, after all.

_Well, Ryan has his faults too. _Marissa reminded herself as she stared at the boy in question. _And who said anything about love anyway?_

Ryan was pacing around the master bedroom of the uncompleted house, lighting the mass amounts of candles that she had brought him earlier, oblivious of her thoughts. As Marissa watched him move, she tried to talk herself out of using the word 'love' when she thought about Ryan Atwood. _You've only known him for a week. _She pointed out. _That's not love. _Well, maybe not, but it could be getting there.

_Stop! _The saner part of Marissa's brain cried and all other thoughts ceased, complying. _You love Luke, remember him? The guy you slept with._

Marissa sighed and wondered if she was going crazy; not only was she carrying on a mental conversation with herself but she was falling in love with a boy she had only known for a week. A boy from Chino, of all places.

_Not that there's anything wrong with Chino_, the part of her brain that was falling in love with Ryan even at that moment pointed out. _He can't help where he was born._

That was true. What if she had been born in Chino instead of New Port? Would it be her in this abandoned house with no where to go, lighting candles for light since the electricity had never even been wired. Marissa wondered if Luke would treat her the same way he treated Ryan if it had been her from Chino.

Ryan finished lighting the last of the candles and turned around to face her, a boyish smile creeping across his lips. _Oh boy, _Marissa thought to herself, forcing her eyes to look away from his cute and attractive face. _Oh boy. _"It's not exactly home yet." Ryan said, as though apologizing. "But it's getting there." He gestured to the camping tent and sleeping bag that had been set up in the middle of the room. Marissa saw that someone -Seth probably- had tacked a poster up to the wall, advertising the band Bright Eyes, which was one of her favorites. Who knew that she would have so much in common with Seth Cohen.

Marissa nodded, trying to force herself back to reality and ignore how adorable Ryan's face looked when he smiled. "As homey as an abandoned house can be."

"Well, it's better then nothing." Ryan pointed out and Marissa nodded again. "Are you all right?" He questioned and Marissa looked up at him, wondering what emotions had played across her face. "You look kinda sick." He headed over toward her and her heart attempted to leap up her throat.

_Remind Luke! _Her head screamed. _Luke! _To her surprise, Marissa stepped back and Ryan looked confused. "I can't do this." She mumbled, more to herself then anyone else.

Ryan looked even more confused. "Do what?" He asked. "Are you sure you're okay?"

Marissa cleared her throat and turned away from him, pretending that the shadows on the wall were the most interesting things she had ever seen in her entire life. She just couldn't look at Ryan's face and see the concern etched on his features; concern for her. If she tried to remember the last time someone had shown honest concern for her, she knew she'd be thinking for quite some time. "I'm fine." She forced herself to answer. "It's just a little stuffy in here, that's all." _Stuffy? _Great excuse.

"I'll open the window." Ryan offered and Marissa watched him out of the corner of her eye as he crossed the room and unlocked the latch on the window. The window had never been opened and stuck for a moment before Ryan was finally able to force it upward. Marissa couldn't help but stare at his muscles as they strained to push the window open. _Oh boy._

"Better?" Ryan questioned after a moment and Marissa nodded, though her mouth still felt dry. "Much." She croaked out but Ryan didn't seem to notice.

Marissa watched as Ryan headed away from the window and sat down in a whicker chair that seemed to have come from someone's trash pile on the side of the road. "Do you want to sit down?" He asked her. "I have another chair in the other room."

"I'm good." Marissa assured him, not quite sure that she could handle sitting next to him. She turned away again, pretending to study the decor as she fought to gain control of herself. What was she doing? She had boyfriend, after all, a boyfriend that she loved very much, a boyfriend that loved her. She should be able to handle herself around Ryan, who was just a friend...wasn't he? _Of course. _Marissa assured herself. _Ryan is just a friend; he's not my boyfriend and I'm not falling in love with him._

But there was no denying the way her heart fluttered in her chest whenever she thought about Ryan and it was even worse when she was near him...like right now. He was just so different from Luke, so different from anyone she had known in New Port. Ryan was so real, so genuine and he actually acted like he cared for her. And that smile! Thinking about it seemed to make her weak in the knees.

"Maybe I will take that chair after all." Marissa muttered, turning around to face Ryan again. Ryan stood and gestured toward his chair; she headed over to where he was standing.

"I'll go get the other chair." Ryan said as he headed out of the room. Marissa sighed and sat down in the chair, which groaned, as though it had withstood all the weight it was going to.

_Get a grip, girl. What's wrong with you? _Marissa thought and she sighed again, answering her own question. _Just the side effects of falling in love. _She shifted her weight in the chair and as soon as she did so, the bottom broke out and the back of the chair collapsed, sending her crashing to the floor.

Marissa sat on the ground amidst the pieces that had once made a chair, blinking, too surprised at what had happened to actually move to stand up. Ryan entered had reentered the room when the chair had collapsed and now he sat down his own chair, heading over to her. "Are you all right?" He questioned, looking like he was trying not to smile.

"Fine." Marissa managed, trying not to laugh herself. She tried to stand, but the outer edge of the chair that hadn't been whicker was tangled around her waist and made it nearly impossible.

Ryan took her hands -Marissa's heart tried to jump out her throat again- and gently pulled her to feet, untangling her from the debris of the chair. "Sure you're okay?" Ryan questioned, looking into her eyes with such intensity that Marissa had to look away.

Marissa pulled away from him as quickly as she could, backing up and nearly tripping over what was left the chair. "Actually, Ryan, I'm not. I can't do this."

"You said that before; you can't do what?" Ryan questioned, looking confused and even a little hurt.

"This." Marissa put emphasis on the word as though that would explain everything. "Being here with you, like this. I have a boyfriend, Ryan."

"I know." Ryan said, looking at her like she had gone dumb for a moment. "I beat him up, remember? What does Luke have to do with us hanging out here together?"

Marissa sighed. "I might be easy for you, Ryan, but it's not for me." She turned away from him and stared out the window. "I think I'm falling in love with you, and I don't really want to but really, what choice did I have?" Her words were coming out so quickly and Marissa didn't even seem conscious of actually speaking. "You're such a sweet guy, so different from Luke and you have the greatest smile...I can't be in love with you, but what else was there to do? I can't be falling in love." Maybe she couldn't blame herself for falling love; Ryan really was all of those things that she said. With a guy as sweet as Ryan around, what else was there to do but fall in love?

Ryan was staring at her like she really had lost her mind. "Marissa..." He began but she turned around and cut him off.

"No, don't say anything." Marissa commanded and Ryan instantly shut his mouth. "I can't fall in love with you. I'm not in love with you. I love Luke." She nodded, as though she had finally solved one of life's great mysteries.

Ryan stepped toward her. "Marissa, listen..." He had so much to tell her, but how was he going to find the words to explain that he was falling for her as well?

"Goodbye Ryan." Marissa said quickly, before he could finish his thoughts and pushed past him, heading out of the model home.

Marissa didn't look back into she was in car, sitting safely behind the steering wheel, mentally praising herself for realizing that she wasn't in love with Ryan. Of course not, how could she be in love with someone like Ryan when she had someone like Luke? She was definitely _not _in love with Ryan Atwood.

Marissa looked up, glancing back toward the window that Ryan had opened only moments ago. She saw him standing by the window, watching her with a mixture of confusion and hurt on his face. She felt her heart lurch.

Yep. She was definitely in love with Ryan Atwood.


End file.
